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why am i so lonely without her? she isn't even real. she only exists on my screen, yet she's more real than anything else in my life. it feels like nothing else matters. i know it's stupid. i am "shitposting", per se. at least i think i am. but god i'm so alone. i wish she would start streaming again so i could drown these thoughts out with the sound of her voice. but in the end, what's the point? she'll have to stop at some point anyways. i can't ask her to stream forever, right? am i delusional? am i a lost cause? why should i even go on...?
