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How do I save a friendship with my oshi when it's based on a lie?
A few months ago, as a mean spirited joke I made an account where I pretended to have cancer (picrel). Afterwards I went on my main account and said I knew the alt account, how he was a dear friend of mine, and how much impact she had on him during his last days.
She herself said that the alt account "lit a fire under her", and solidified her passion for streaming. So all and all it's a net positive, but I'm starting to feel extremely guilty about the situation, and want to come clean while still maintaining the friendship.
These past few months this streamer has grown on me, and I care deeply about them. They are so kind and compassionate to every single viewer, and the last thing I want to do is break her trust.
So how do I gently diffuse this situation?