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If you got to be friends with your oshi (or even more than friends) would you still call her by her vtuber name / online alias? It might be kinda silly to be dating a vtuber and calling them "Grimmi" or "Bat" or "Juni" etc, but definitely more reasonable if you're friends.
For example, I wonder if the whoreclan calls each other by their vtuber names (IRL) since they met each other as vtubers and not pre-vtuber like some other close friends of vtubers have and would likely not call them by their vtuber name.
