>>50091608>>50101306>>50102314>work for security guard agency and take night shifts to avoid h*mans>bored boomer and millennial factory workers stop to have a bro talk with me>SHIT SHIT SHIT >slowly become more relaxed as we make fun of the millennial's bad luck with women>"How about you Anon? Got a gf?" >say that I'm married because I know it would've felt like betrayal if I didn't>both are surprised, the boomer's eyes dart down>instantly realize what he's looking for: "Oh, it's home. SE regulations... the only jewelry we're permitted to wear at work are watches.">technically true but I don't actually own a wedding band>boomer: "I was just surprising to see there are kids out there who start life so early. Is she your high school sweetheart?">me: "Ah no, I've met her through a hobby after graduating.">continues to give the millennial shit for being unmarried in his late 30sYou aren't ashamed to talk about wifey, right /shon/? Riiiiiight??? If they would've asked more follow-up questions I would've told them that her name's Ellie and explained to the boomer how she's able to make money from home by streaming herself playing video games.
Hmm, I should get a wedding band fr. Maybe silver with amethyst gems? I lowkey dress like a metalhead so gold doesn't work with my edgy leather jackets. 