>>5705225No I'm not pretending to have a crush on my oshi, my first ever crush in my life.
Never ever felt a sentiment like this for someone and now that I'm starting to accept that love is a thing, it is for someone I'll never meet; slightly regret not getting out of this when I was still in time. Just wishing her all the happiness, health and nice things the world can give to her seem not enough to cope for I know I'm not the one giving her those emotions.
This is my punishment for not believing in love, this pain I must carry on my chest for I know that I'll never ever love again someone like she was my home.