>>16668844Oh my god this is powerful... okay tell you what, I'll give you a reading...
The Core of your Question is symbolized by the Four of Swords. This card represents rest and relaxation, contemplation and perhaps also recuperation. If we are to put it in another perspective, perhaps what you seek is solace from the loneliness, a possibility to rest up and feel safe, to allow yourself the time to just center yourself. Loneliness, and unrequited love, can cause us untold amounts of stress and may prevent us from reaching that peace of mind we seek.
Unfortunately for you, the Reversed Ace of Cups is your biggest hurdle to overcome. This card represents self-love and repressed emotions. A focus inwards where the upright card instead focuses on outward love and compassion. This means that you are struggling with your own self-worth and your inability to see yourself as a person worthy of love. It's possible that you are asking this because the idea of marrying her symbolizes a kind of "idealized happiness" because of appealing character traits, and also the knowledge somewhere that it's unattainable. A lot of times, we long for things we know are impossible to the point where trying might not even be worth it. It might seem strange to wish for something like that, but it's in fact quite the contrary; by setting up unrealistic goals, we push ourselves while at the same time we can be content that we may never actually get there, and thus need not fear disappointment with reality not living up to our idea.
The cards suggest to you the six of Pentacles. It is a card of Giving, of generosity, charity and sharing wealth. Were I a cynic, I would say they are telling you to give her donations and to share your money with her, but that hardly seems like it would lead to what you desire. Instead I'm going to say that you will need to be willing to give AND receive love; if you do not want your desire for marriage to become an obsession, you must learnt to give off yourself and make yourself a person worth loving as well. Which you are! But merely desiring and "having" someone does not make for a good, balanced relationship. You must also work on yourself!
