>>10031272So a while ago I went to the doctors and after 8 weeks of counselling and lots of blood tests they decided the never ending sadness in me was due to a mega vitamin D deficiency. I also got a bonus calcium and iron shortage too which was a real treat. Despite being a big girl who can swallow even the most bitter pills, they gave me effervescent vitamin D and calcium combined which was rancid. Now I HATE fizzy drinks and all squash except Ribena so I was not impressed at all. Over the next two months I got most of my ‘special drinks’ down me and unsurprisingly felt a lot better.
The iron supplements they prescribed at the same time were out of stock at most pharmacy’s so I could only get them today and it reminded me I had some effervescent tablets left. I decided to see what would happen if I ate one and after licking it and confirming it tasted like sweeties I swallowed it whole. THIS IS WHERE THE FUCKERY STARTED.
It got stuck as soon as I swallowed it and was right at the top of my throat fizzing menacingly. I wasn’t sure if I could breathe to start with and was panicking that I was going to be the recipient of a well deserved Darwin Award. (I feel like I should point out, without sounding like a dick, that I’m usually at least a bit intelligent but all logic failed me today) So this is getting painful, it’s a huge tablet that takes several minutes to dissolve in water usually and my throat is feeling quite sore already. I’ve got my partner stood next to me and I’m fully expecting him to have to give me the Heimlich maneuver. I know I have at least another five minutes of pain plus gas is starting to build up and I’m getting lemony, stinging burps too.
For the first time in my life I stick my fingers down my throat and make myself sick. It takes three lots of watery sick before the chunks of sizzling hell finally come out and I feel like I can breathe properly again.