I am literally in love with the zombie. I am in love with the zombie more than words in the english language can properly describe. "head over heels" doesn't even begin to describe the depth of my love, saying that I'm "madly in love" with her or that I get butterflies in my stomach thinking about her are both such dramatic understatements that I could be convicted of lying on the podium if I said them in court. I love the zombie so much that I can't describe it with words, and I can't describe it with noises either, or even actions. If I spent the rest of my waking life with the zombie, every second telling her how much I love her, how perfect she is, how beautiful her laugh is, how comfortable around her I am, wrapping my arms around her and planting my lips on hers. If I spent literally the rest of my life performing every act that signifies deep physical and emotional intimacy with the zombie it would still not accurately portray the full extent of my feelings for her. The entire universe itself contains but a fraction of the space needed to convey my love for the zombie in context to the rest of the world. I have no way to express even how little what I've said thus far truly means in terms of how much I cherish the zombie. Words alone are not articulate enough to convey the emotions that run through my brain whenever I see the zombie. I scoured various languages, idioms, flower arrangements, nothing it good enough. If I could format text better I'd have this whole rant written out in bright pink script fond with lots of heart shaped accents because that would be as close as I could get in text form to saying how much I love the zombie, and it wouldn't even begin to give you a proper representation. The end of the universe may obliterate me, you, everyone here, but my love will live on. In fact, I love the zombie so much that love as a word is not strong enough. Infatuation, obsession, yearning, fondness, attachment, none of it is enough. I love the zombie to an extent that you can not even conceptualize because if you could you would've written this out first.
