>>22393487I wish i could get amphetamines or ritalin legally in my country. Im actually going to therapist soon beacuse of that reason beacuse the only time ive ever been productive in my life is after ive had a dopamine burst in my brain. Whether its from smoking cigs or masturbating. I honestly cant pay attention whatsoever and instead of focusing on subject at hand i just pay more attention to distractions around me. It kind of made ne spiral into this depression where i feel apathetic towards any and everything. Ive been like this since i was 13. I dont think ive ever studied or did a homework assignment in my life, which is a goddamn shame beacuse even without doing those things ive been at the top of my class usually flying through the final exams. I really want to change. Starting watching these girls made me want to change. I just want to fucking do something with my life, instead of being in this state of completely disabled brain, sitting in front of my pc or phone and just looking at distractions of any kind just beacuse they bring my monkey brain some dopamine bursts.
