I really enjoyed the watchalong. Nobody was into cartoons when I was a kid, least of all when I was older because such people and such subcultures simply don't exist in Croatia. It's not that the interest in them is shunned or shameful - it's simply nonexistent. With some exceptions here and there none of my friends ever wanted to watch cartoons with me, thus we did other stuff. However, I moved around a lot and forming long term friendships and bonds simply couldn't and didn't happen, and I distinctly remember how I always wanted a friend with whom I could share this interest of mine. Gradually, a perfectly innocent notion developed about how awesome i would be to have a female friend who was into cartoons, and it fascinated me because it seemed impossible as the cartoons that I watched. Perfect fiction. I had some female friends and acquaintances, but if the guys weren't into cartoons you can imagine just how little interest the girls had. Yes, anime is equally nonexistent as a thing here. It didn't take root during the late 90s and early 00s, and now it sure as hell won't.
In any case, 1995 marks the end of the Croatian war for independence. And I was 9 years old. My parents promptly divorced the moment my father returned from the war. The war had nothing to do with that, the problems predated it. And it was in 95 that I started to watch the Powerpuff Girls. Specifically, the What A Cartoon shorts, ergo pilots. I liked the show and the girls immediately. Somehow it resonated with me, perhaps on the simple basis that I experienced utter helplessness during the war and the divorce of my parents. Shit continued rolling downhill from that point in amusing ways, but fiction became my refuge, and to a small boy seeing these superpowered little girls took on a restorative, encouraging function. The above mentioned wish for a friend with whom I could watch this show was perpetually present.
All of that was 27 years ago. And now Gura has fulfilled my wish. Once more, she amazes me. Effortlessly, unknowingly, she means something, is something far beyond the scope of a mere entertainer. Even while I was watching the show with her and all of you, my imagination presented the simple image of little me and her just sitting next to each other in a sunlit room, in front of my old TV. The ancient dream of that boy has been fulfilled, and I felt like I was watching myself as I once was across the gulf of time. In a way I met myself once more, and that boy never died, never disappeared, never gave up or lost anything. I simply continued being myself, changing, growing, experiencing. But the clear line and a feeling of wholeness is here, and I feel it strongly. This tiny, insignificant wish from long ago has been fulfilled in the best possible way. Was it too late? Has it lost meaning? No, not in the slightest. There is a great mystery of life here. Somehow, it all fell into place in the best possible way. Life is cool sometimes.
There is nothing melancholy or nostalgic about this feeling. I am full of gratitude towards Gura. Somehow, despite everything I am smiling. It all makes sense even if I cannot truly see or comprehend it.
