>>30530761blog post incoming. You don't wanna read it? Call me a nigger and move on.
I've been /here/ a long time, May/June 2021 iirc (Can't remember exactly, but around LazuLight's debut. I also remember being here for the original /become/ thread when it was an actual schizo behind it and that was around the timeframe I listed.) and I feel it's fucking ruined me as a person.
I've tried my hand at other social media sites before. Twitter had me getting into retarded arguments 24/7, leddit's nothing but a hugbox where you're banned for saying anything negative, Insta's just for ethots and teens (I had to join a group chat for a class of mine, I didn't really make an acct because I wanted to, i had to for that instance, but you get the point). I don't remember how I stumbled upon this board, but I remember just checking this site out for the first time and getting interested at the prospect of a chuuba board, so I joined, and continuously fell for the shittiest bait and schizo threads, still do. I don't know, I sort of take solace in that I'm talking with people who are just as retarded as I am (diagnosed autist, always sucked with friends), and I've been telling myself for ages to get the fuck off this board (and this site in general) because of how fucking unhinged everything is. When I'm not threadwatching, I'm just playing vidya, eating, or doing chores. Maybe exercise every couple days. Even then, sometimes I scroll here while I go outside for walks and shit. This site's swallowed me whole. I want to take this site out of my consciousness, it's like I'm fucking addicted. I know I have things I actually want to do besides shitpost here, but I'm often on here for hours at a time, constantly refreshing the catalog.
I know this isn't great for my mental health, but I've always struggled with mental health, and vidya/internet had always been a coping mechanism I've had, so this just becomes an endless negative feedback loop.
Maybe someday I can break the habit that is constantly scrolling this board.
