>>40972573>You're lonely and you refuse to become a functional and acceptable member of society, you can justify your state however you want, but don't blame anyone but yourself for people laughing at you.You are enslaved to the people you fear, tourist, and you fear everyone. You're not a "functioning member of society", you're "acceptable", couldn't phrased that better: a pathetic attempt at adjusting your outward appearance, actions and views to match whatever trash might have looked funny at you in the past. Because you fear, you fear being laughed at, you fear going against the flow even a little, because after all the adjusting you've performed on your own self, you don't have anything left besides that flow.
You're now a hollow husk carried by the waves of mediocrity, and that makes you feel existential dread everyday. To fight that dread, you try to fill the husk with the mediocrity that surrounds you, to revel in these foreign ideas, dull pleasures, but that doesn't bring you any enjoyment. You are unhappy. That is why you shudder at mere sight of people going against the flow so freely, you are envious because they have courage to do what you could never do. So you try to bark for your masters, to go around spitting vitriol, but that doesn't help at all. You'll never be happy, you lost your chance forever.
I despise people that laugh at others being different and impose their views, but at least they are also expressing themselves freely. But you, and others like you? You are pathetic. You're scum under the boots of the strong, and you deserve nothing but being laughed at, forever.
