I never thought I'd be parasocial to any chuuba because I just see them as just funny entertainers but after Scarle's recent streams and this happened, I somehow felt a combination of jealousy, resentment to Scarle and shame of myself for being this invested in this hobby....
I apologize for making fun of you and calling you Parasocial freaks /vt/ I understand now.

I will not turn involuntary Celebate nor become mysgonist but I now jave a huge distrust on women I may encounter in the future.

All thosr months of being a member, all those supas I sent and this is what I get in the end.

Am I wrong to feel this way /vt/? Is it my fault? Is it Scarle? Is it Nijisanji? I feel like its my fault but I exerted so much effort and my time for this and I feel betrayed. I don't know what to think anymore, I cant express this in twitter and reddit because I'll just get called an Incel, even my friends and my family will just make fun of me. I dont have anyone to talk to about this am I just fucked for life now?