Quoted By:
It's not really a trauma dump, just some thoughts I wanted to write.
I have a virtual fetish. I don't mean a sexual fetish, I mean it literally, I mean an object with magical powers. This fetish is old videogames. Some are videogames I played as a kid. Monster rancher, zoo tycoon—I know we all have them. Artifacts of a lost age, powered by our faith and memories I always liked the concept of faith being something that power Gods in a self-feeding loop. It was something black & white, another of the aforementioned games, introduced me to. That game also introduced me to this type of loop. Writing this, I checked my games on steam. Dominions 3 and FM2012, how many hours I put into them. Dominions 5 and FM2015, how much you disappointed me. Metal fatigue, I never finished it. The idea of stealing the other players' tech was so cool, and I liked the 3 levels of the map.
But the real fetish, the real magic, is in old games I never played. I never played Pharaoh, and yet it tempts me. It gives me soft memories of a past that was never real. Memories lie. But these memories do not lie, they are not lies. They are cinema. They are movies. Stories that never happened except in the imagination of someone. Homesick for a place I'm not even sure exists? nay, I know it doesn't exist, but I still want to visit it.
