i'm a 32 year old autist kissless handholdless virgin, i've been a neet for a decade, probably unemployable, the west is collapsing anwyay, lockdown meme virus means there's no reason to leave the house. even if i lucked into a job and a relationship it would be entirely predicated on my value as a unit of economic productivity. might as well just let myself sink into the abyss and fall for a cute anime girl on youtube. her voice, her relaxed manner, her 80 iq, her comfy minecraft and zatsudan streams, these are the things i wake up for. i sit in my chinkshit gaming chair, swaddled in blankets and propped up by a couple of pillows, my electric heater under my desk and just sit borderline comatose for however many hours she decides to stream. or perhaps i just lie in bed with my phone, a hot water bottle under the quilt and overthrow. this way achieves maximum comfort but i feel slight disgust at watching on a phone. then i spend the rest of my time in a desperate scramble to improve my japanese to a point where i can have close to full comprehension of what she is saying before she retires. it might be futile but i will pursue this goal no matter what. and when the day comes that she retires, well, i can just find someone else. with each day that passes, the vtuber world becomes ever more saturated.