Ouro Kronii, while you—you lay there, hopefully as uncomfortable as you possibly can be, I want you to listen to me. I want you to digest this because before I leave in 3 weeks with your precious Company in Tatters, I have a lot of things I want to get off my chest.
I don't hate you, Kronii. I don’t even dislike you. I do like you. I like you a hell of a lot more than I like most people in the back. I hate this idea that you're the best. Because you're not. I'm the best. I'm the best in the world. There's one thing you're better at than I am: And that's kissing YAGOO's ass. You're as good as kissing YAGOO's ass as Pekora was. I don't know if you're as good as 'Carrot' though. She's a pretty good ass kisser. Always was and still is. Whoops, I'm Breaking the Fourth Wall...
(Fauna waves to the camera)
I Have the best CCV in HoloEN. I've been the best since day one when I walked into this company. And I've been vilified and hated since that day because A-chan saw something in me that nobody else wanted to admit. That's right, I'm a A-chan gal. You know who else was a A-chan gal ? Sakamata Chloe And she split, just like I'm splitting. But the biggest difference between me and Chloe is I'm going to leave with the Company Burning.
I've grabbed so many of YAGOO's imaginary brass rings that it's finally dawned on me that they're just that: they're completely imaginary. The only thing that's real is me and the fact that day in and day out, for almost six years, I have proved to everybody in the world that I am the best on this microphone, in that ring, even on commentary! Nobody can touch me! And yet, no how—no matter how many times I prove it... I'm not on your lovely little collector cups, I'm not on the cover of the program, I'm barely promoted, I don't get to be in movies, and I'm certainly not on any crappy show on the USA Network. I'm not on the poster of Holofes, I'm not on the signature that's produced at the start of the show. I'm not on Conan O'Brien, I'm not on Jimmy Fallon, but the fact of the matter is I should be. And trust me, this isn't sour grapes. But the fact that 'Rebecca' is in the main event at Holofes next year and I'm not makes me sick!
Oh hey, let me get something straight: Those of you who are cheering me right now, you are just as big a part of me leaving as anything else! Because you're the ones who are sipping on those collector cups right now. You're the ones that buy those programs that my face isn't on the cover of. And then at 5 in the morning at the airport, you try to shove it in my face and get an autograph and try to sell it on eBay because you're too lazy to go get a real job.
I'm leaving with COVER on January 3rd. And hell, who knows, maybe I'll go Stream with Phase Connect. Maybe...I'll go back to Vshojo.
(Punk looks at the camera and waves) Hey, fallenshadow, how you doing?
The reason I'm leaving is you people. Because after I'm gone, you're still going to pour money into this company. I'm just a spoke on the wheel, the wheel is going to keep turning, I understand that. But YAGOO is going to make money despite himself. He's a millionaire who should be a billionaire. You know why he's not a billionaire? Because he surrounds himself with glad-handed, non-sensical, douchebag yes men, like Hoshimachi Suisei, who's going to tell him everything he wants to hear. And I'd like to think that maybe this company will better after Vince McMahon's dead. But the fact is, it's—it's going to be taken over by his idiotic daughter Sora and his doofus Friend, Fubuki and the rest of his stupid "family". Let me tell you a personal story about YAGOO all right? Here we're doing this whole HOLOEARTH App—" (Fauna's mic gets cut off as he mouths "I've been silenced!" afterwards)
