I have an abusive family who are all mentally ill. My sister and dad have bi-polar, and I suspect my mom does as well. They are all impatient horrible people who have treated me like shit my entire life. My mom and dad are divorced and Im living with my mom after I have graduated college trying to figure my life out. The level of stress and abuse I have to deal with is absurd. On on occasion, I woke up early to train for the Navy at 6:30am. My mom got up and started screaming at the top of her lungs at me, that she likes to be alone in the morning and I should still be in bed.
Even my childhood friends have been abusive. One is in a mental asylum for killing his mom. Another had ASPD and would be physically abusive at times. Just awful abusive people most of my life.

Then I watch hololive, and get some kind of escape from this abusive cycle of psychopaths I have to deal with, this fucking cunt mother who keeps asking me when I'm going to move out and won't let me figure my life out all this shit. Fuwawa is just so sweet, her lovely laugh, her kindness, her care and consideration. I can't imagine a more perfect woman than her. I want someone like her so bad who would be concerned for me, who would care for me, who wouldn't be so enormously self centered and mean toward me. You can't imagine how badly I desire that kindness from someone I care about.