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I'm new here, I've been visiting this site since this february or so. I'm depressed since last December and my depression just comes and goes some days with apparently no reason. I hate my school and I'm not accepted there at all and have 1 friend there. I'm antisocial, I mean I can be with people and be "normal", make jokes, pretend I have fun and I enjoy time with them, it is just that I don't like them, I don't like being out every friday doing the same things once again.
I'm quite good with my studies and I guess that is a problem here because "nerds" don't have friends although I don't fit with the image of a nerd, I'm just a common guy. I don't think I'm intelligent, just that school is so easy.
I often (more than once a day) why I'm still living and why I didn't kill myself yet because it would be so much easier and so much better. I know it is from cowards (or at least that is what people think), but I'm one and I have no problem in accepting it. I wake up thinking that after 14 hours I'll be sleeping again.
I love vydia and time. I love "weird" music like Asking for Alexandria, and cars, I don't understand much about them but at least I can distinguish ones from others and know the model it is. I love football (soccer) I play it on a team but I'm not good at all in it.
I know it is useless but I thought this was a good thread and maybe some Anon could help me or give me some advice.
Thanks before hand.
