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made this from what another anon said in the thread. stretched the text a bit but thats just what i like personally.
my ex broke up with me almost two years ago. its going to be my birthday in two days, but i dont feel like celebrating anything. im starting to appreciate my family but i dont feel connected to anybody but my ex. i dont feel that anything is worth celebrating.
i had a dream in which we had a child. since then im no longer afraid of the responsibility, but i wont experience that either way. i have lost all attraction for other people. sexual things disgust me. ive been drinking more although i really want to just experience true emotions. im rambling. but i feel like im in a dream.
I went outside and ended up staring at a tree with a lamp on it that shone light which flickered off bushes beneath it with leaves gently swaying in the wind. My eyes zoned out and I just watched as the glimmering lights came together into a beautiful puzle like a wave rolling through a dark ocean made visible only by the faintest moonlight. I feel like I'm in a dream and I don't want to wake up.
