>>6987708>from then on, my perception of women was always a bit fucked>I still see females as a shallow group of people >don't fully trust anything they say, because they will do the opposite and switch up on you in a heartbeat, especially looking like me>of course I don't let this show when I actually talk to girls>have better luck with women irl and in school, but can't get a gf because indian>I have no problem talking with girls and I've gotten pretty good at making them laugh>make sure to differentiate myself from those nasty, cringy, autistic Indians>but there's always a barrier and she can't bring herself to like me in a romantic sense>workout, gain weight, get some nice ass muscles after several years>get into med school, on track to become a cardiothoracic surgeon >but no matter how big I get, no matter how much I make her laugh, no matter how much money I make, no matter how many times she says I'm the one for her>it's hopeless>at the end of the day, I'm a dark ass ugly ass Indian nigga and I can't do anything about it>think about how easy life would be if I were white, or at least a light-skinned Aladdin type indian>I get so depressed whenever I think back to my teen years>how quickly girls would leave me, even after weeks of talking and them promising that they would stay>no amount of self improvement will result in a female being attracted to me because of how I was born I would be better off as a bird or a fish or some shit. I've almost stopped caring about relationships entirely.
To be completely honest, I only see one path for myself:
>buy a massive house>buy all the cars I've ever wanted>buy a shit ton of drugs>buy some expensive ass hookers, like model-tier>fuck all of them, OD, and die a happy deathThis is viable with my income
Thanks for reading my vent, if anyone did. It's pretty scattered, but it feels good to let it out.
