>>6251461>>6251491I feel a lot like this, like i'm not gonna be able to find someone who can see my third face and say "it will be alright, i'm here for you" and mean it. for me the first and second face are both really similar in front of everyone but my mom I put on my first face "mask". but my second mask can sometimes shine through the first and mix up and are essentially at times the same. no one has seen my third. I don't even know if I have.
So I don't know what my point is but I sometimes get this feeling of solipsism, and how in this world I have made, I have chosen to torture myself by never giving myself happiness
in the form of having someone who loves me and actually gets me, because my brain simple cannot make this person. so it leaves me wistful, longing for a feeling I can't make up.
