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I recently just finished university, I loved it depsite my final year being nothing but constant stress and pressure. The worse thing about it all, is just that I feel just as clueless as to what to do next, as I was going in. And since then I've returned to my quiet but dull, sleepy countryside town, where I no longer feel like I belong. Either old friends have never really left and seem like different people to me now, or they've moved on to greener pastures and are not to be seen again. I've always had on and off depression, and suffered from bouts of anxiety but it was seemingly under control at uni. Now I've returned I spiraled negatively, and feel permanently stuck locked away in cycle of confusion and misery. I've never felt as lost as I do now, which is made worse by becoming a NEET with no plans to get away. My parents at least have finally understand that my anxiety is in obstacle in me making a postive change and finding worthwhil;e employment, and I've even started therapy so there is always that. I'm hoping I'm able to find a purpose but it does feel along way away. The only real goal I have is to move to city and find myself a nice apartment where I can final feel settled. But that seems along away off. My depression seems to be worsening, and I think about killing myself daily, its also a sap on my motivation which leaves me doing nothing but dream and doing little to achieve said dreams.
On the plus side I can say that I have started to do something about, and my family are at least starting to understand I'm struggling. Hopefully it won't be much longer until I feel ready to stand on my own two feet and get out of this self-pitying and self-destructive rut I find myself in. This picture often brings a smile to face and for second, just one second I feel calm.
This is great thread btw OP
