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Okay, here goes.
>be me 25, fresh outta collage, meet a single mom, go on a few dates, hit it off
>few months in I move in with her and her boys
> after a few months, I proposed, she said yes
> I get it it was really fast, but we've made a promise to one another - "All or nothing" - so I went all in, and had no problem with that, was actually happy and at piece with myself, getting along with her and kids both, finally feel safe, accepted, like I belong
>fast forward 3 years, a few months back she gives me the ring back "anon I'm not happy anymore, with myself, with you, but don't get me wrong it's not you, and I'm not breaking up, just giving you back the ring so you can give it to me again, when things are better"
>for me, returning the ring ment that she wasnt 100 % sure, for whatever reason
>don't know if it will ever be the same again
>afraid that if we go trough this, and get married anyways that soon enough we'll start to resent and hate each other for not letting go and trying to find happines elseware
>afraid if the fundation of our whole commitment gets destroyed that the marriage is bound to crash and burn, just a matter of time
>confronted her - told her that if she's not happy I'll leave, and maybe then, when we're both apart from each other we'll realise both our issues and the issues of the other person and option 1 : we'll realise, talk it out, get back on track; or option 2 : we'll realise that it really wasn't ment to be and move on to find happines with someone else
>meanwhile she's working all the time, we barely see each other
>staying home with the kids - taking care of them and the house etc...
>soon kids will leave for the summer and we'll be alone, that's when I'm planing to tell her that I'll look for a place and leave
>I'll miss her, and the kids too, but I don't think she'll prevent me or them from seeing eachother
>I know we still love each other deeply - but sometimes it just isn't enough
>hope that Im making the right choice
