>>7179134I feel you on the paranoia, too bad for your brain you get hallucinations though. I mean I isolated for 7 years, through high school, with no luck. Just got out of it those months ago on my meds. I can see why you hate "pride", though your parents have an abusive mentally ill type. I'm glad you could go outside and get a job by yourself, very good.
My parents just never talked to me much, they work all the time because we almost lost the house many times. They were the fuel to my drug/smoke problem, but thats all i can say. I still live with them and they only help with material goods like food and a bed. Oh well Idc about that.
Thing is, i met many rapists and molesters in my life, and many of my good friends were victims. Everyone I knew was either hurting or getting hurt. Sure I went through some of that myself. I can still remember the pain they gave off. There were male victims as well, I doubt it was my gender controlling this. Too many bad people all thieves, crack heads, and rapey. I couldnt go outside. I tried to help my friend I wanted to punch the bastard in the face but i froze up like a fool, of course I stopped him, but fuck they deserve pain. Is it my female brain or trauma, I will never know. My friends are mentall ill.. they cannot help me I cannot help them. I think of all the criminals deaths every night. No one I knew deserved it, but I understand how you think they might of been bad people.
