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I've never felt so shitty in my life. To experience this pain. To feel like it was my fault or that I was too fucking small to matter. I was neglected, but unintentionally. Because he was so self loathing and insignificant to himself.
I can't believe I was in such denial, that I suffered, watching this person slowly disappear. I literally saw him dissipate. I knew I had lost him emotionally. But it wasn't until a year ago, I truly did lose him as a physical human being.