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So next month I'll be in basic training for the military (I chose Army) and I've been thinking about my past ranging from middle school shenanigans to some unfortunate events later on in life that changed alot for me (I don't want to go into too much detail ykyk.) I feel like after I'm done with basic and once I get settled in with the military I wanna leave my old life behind in a way. I'm planning on quitting all forms of contact with my family for good (It's not a huge family, just three members but we're not close at all) and leaving my current friend group because honestly I feel like alot of them are extremely fake besides like 2. There's more reasons on why I am going to do this but I'd rather not share. I will say that I haven't felt as lonely as I have currently before. I'm not saying I'm depressed or anything, in fact I'm excited about next month and I'm looking forward to pushing towards my goals, but I feel like I'm alone in doing so which in a way I am. But I don't have any sort of decent support system and I feel like a few of my very own "friends" hope I don't make it at all and that sounds extremely paranoid of me to say but It's the way they act towards me. It just feels so fake in a way.
I'm probably ranting way too much now, but I appreciate those who just read this and relate silently. I wish for all of y'all to succeed with this year's endeavors and whatever life has in store for you comes off as good.
