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21. have a job that pays decent, can pay my bills fine. not in school. hate it. the idea of dropping money on something i would have the worst time focusing on and be even more miserable makes me sick. social life is ok. could be better, have friends i care about. dont have a gf. wish i did. always been awful at relationships so only had short things before i think they get annoyed by me. only thing i can focus on any more is music. i will sit there and work on one track no one will hear for hours. maybe ill get home from work at 10:30 and stay up till 3 in the morning trying to fine tune it and still not like it. but at the end it doesnt matter if i dont like it. music is the only thing i can put that much effort and focus into anymore. but at the same time i have to force myself to start but once i get into the swing of it im chugging along.
started forcing myself to go out, explore, try new things, get new hobbies. went to canada with my friend recently and now im trying to learn french.
inb4 someone links me to melon heads motivation video.
