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Hey OP, A year ago I lived in a posh suburb of Tokyo with a live-in girlfriend I was with for 3 years and an easy, moderately well paying job.
She left because her visa ran out, and alone, I decided to give in to my long standing war with alcoholism. In the span of 2 weeks, I lost my job, my house, most of my friends and eventually ended up in the hospital, in a psychiatric ward.
After a week there, I was discharged and pseudo-deported. Upon getting "home" I had absolutely nothing. I wasn't even able to grab a change of clothes as my apartment had been condemned.
I still kept in contact with my girlfriend, but I knew she had had enough, and wanted to start a family with someone she could depend on. A month went by and she told me she had met someone. 2 months went by and she had become engaged. It has now been over a year, and she is married and has a child.
All of this probably means nothing to you, but just trust yourself. "Finding yourself" isn't bullshit, it is what we're all here to do. So use this time to travel inward and rebuild your fractured Self.
It is a scary and difficult task, but the good news is, accepting the task is more important than succeeding or failing at it.
And do not fear, for once you begin traveling inward, where you had thought to find monsters, instead, you will find a God.