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We're sailing these treacherous seas of depression, self-hatred, anxiety, loneliness and suicide with you OP. These waters are dangerous and many will no make it, being lost in the storms. I see surviving suicide as falling overboard but making it back on ship. The two of us have fallen overboard OP, that's an experience not many go through, it's an experience we can learn from and build from. We'll make it to the harbor together bro.