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I enter a second elevator next to the one I exited and go down to the 39,999th floor right below my penthouse, whose windows all gaze out to a suborbital view of the Earth and space, which is peppered with nebulae, stars, and picturesque planets close enough to be seen and as colorful as they look when NASA Photoshops them. My office floors windows are an underwater view of various coral reefs and fascinating sea creatures, some beautiful, some terrifying. The aesthetic of my office is brown with red everywhere. My secretary is Christina Hendricks. She greets me wearing yoga pants and a sports bra and gives me an inappropriately close hug. It is approximately 12:30. I have just arrived to work, so I enter my office for lunch. My office is sparsely furnished with a single large desk and a computer. I turn on my computer and Christina Hendricks presents me with a styrofoam box with some sort of greasy diner burger or sandwich and seasoned fries. I eat this with a bottle of San Pellegrino and a lime, miraculously leaving my suit untouched from spots and stains. I watch YouTube videos during my lunch, made new and hilarious each and every day by creative and original people that cater to my sense of humor.
