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I'm a second year medical student. It's been 2 months since I've considered killing myself. From about day 1 I had thought about it every single day. I got help from a councilor, and it didn't help. I have a bottle of painkillers I got from a surgery over break that I didn't use. So I have a means now, which if I did back then I wouldn't be here. There are not many options left when you're over 100k in debt. You can't just up and walk away from that to pursue your less lucrative dreams.
When I first started school I thought I'd be among my peers, and therefore would find that one perfect girl. I was wrong. And it has been a lonely experience. I'm pretty social on top of being tall, fit, and decently attractive (or so I believe), but I haven't loved or been loved in 5 years.
But now I'm content. My major board exams in June give me a goal to devote myself to. And when I need to, I take some edibles, drink some beer, and watch a new movie. At this point, if I am meant to find love, I'll find it, and if not, then I will put my all into my practice, and that sounds pretty good to me.
