>>7501337I have no friends. My closets "friend" only comes to visit to use my highspeed internet and get cheap bud because I live in a legal state. All my other "friends" turned into shit-talking gossip queens around 22-24ish, and I got sick of listening to all of them talk behind everyones back. Everyone was under the illusion that they were the one that "no one talked shit about" while talking copious amounts of shit about everyone else. It was mentally draining, and the entire group was all about "who did what", and a follow up dogpile of social pariah outcasting.
Now I sit here and drive myself to the brink of mental insanity, surrounded by the most mentally incompetent people in the globe who can't hold a conversation for the life of them. Seriously, talking about work topics the other day and I look over to see my co-worker/boss (we work together) blowing fucking spitbubbles like a toddler and giggling to himself.
At this point anons. I'm just waiting for my mother to die so I can off myself without the guilt of destroying her life. Thats really all thats happening. Biding time till I can stick a shotgun down my throat and order the Cobain Special.
There is no friendships, no one actually cares. You can try and try and try to be a smart, respectable, competent person, but in the end it all really doesn't matter. Not in a highschool emo way, but no one actually cares, nor do I care about them. Life is chalked down to a simple integer of 2. 2 hour window of viewing your dead corpse, 2 weeks of phantom memories in your loved ones heads, 2 month of sadness, 2 years of remembrancer, 2 decades of thought, and 2 centuries until permanent erasure (tomb stone decay).
