>>13492823In 5th grade I was a "conflict mediator" at recess. It was a rotating position that everyone had to do for a week. You got to wear a special vest at recess and go around policing kids with a clipboard to record bad behavior.
My turn came and I went around recording everything. On the first day, during our 15 minute recess, I had something like 30 kids for swearing, pushing, violating dress code, having damaged textbooks etc. Whoever talked shit, I said "I'm the conflict mediator." On Wednesday I wrote up our homeroom teacher for swearing. By Thursday they tried to take away my vest so I said I'll stop. I was pretty upset so I decided to piss on the school 3 times that day, shit on the grass at one corner of the school and, for good measure, wipe shit from my ass on the bathroom door handles. I wrote down that another kid I hated did it and asserted this when the school investigated. He was suspended for 3 weeks and came back with bruises as his parents beat his ass for being nasty. I assumed they beat him up every day for those 3 weeks and it gave me very peaceful sleep.
