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his looks don't matter, he's shy, nerdy, and depressed over missing out as a teen. no job prospects, no education, no ambitions. maybe we meet online playing games, or by chance when he crawls out of his neet cave to get food, i'll know when i see him. he's been spiraling in his own abyss for who knows how long, and i'm going to save him. i'll reach out a hand as a friend, push him to exercise, cook for him, play games, and even if he doesn't want to i'll push him to at least go to a community college, i'll push him to dress better, groom better, socialize more, i want him to succeed.
with enough work and encouragement i'll pull him out of his abyss. it doesn't matter what he does as long as there's a spark in his eyes. at this point my work is done, i should let him go, letting go is the moral thing to do, he could do much better than me. but i don't want that. i'm selfish, and i'm scared, i don't want to be alone. i won't let him leave me. i'll pull him into my own abyss.
it won't take much, all the bloodplay and choking during sex won't make it hard to ease him into domestic abuse, all it takes is a little push. once he's laid a hand on me he's fallen in, and there's no going back. i'll keep pushing him, i'll keep encouraging more and more violence, until one day it's too much. one day he'll have had enough and he won't stop, i'll be used to the punches but he'd go past his normal threshold, i'll keep telling him how much i love him, because in my own way i do, and it'll piss him off so much he'll begin to strangle me.
i won't fight back, i'll caress his face as he drains the life out of me, i can't say it by this point but i do love him, and can't fall without taking him with me. i'll die fast, i'm not strong. he'll hold my limp body and cry. after that it's his choice, but he knows what to do, after all there was never any hope for us.
