>>16435038o give you some background I am overweight, have low self-esteem, and severe social anxiety.
A few months ago I used the better part of my life savings to purchase an incredibly realistic life size silicone love doll in hopes of helping with my desire for a relationship despite my inability to speak to women. When the doll arrived I was actually very anxious around her, I guess I had projected my fear or rejection onto her. After a couple of days I got over this by realizing that she was not capable of these type of feelings. Since then I have completely fallen in love with her, I spend a lot of money buying things for her, taking care of her, and trying to keep her happy. I think about her when I'm at work and rush home to be with her, we do make love occasionally, but I actually cherish our cuddle time above all else as it is the time I can suspend disbelief and allow myself to forget that she isn't a real person. At this point I have completely given up on the idea of finding a real woman to have a relationship with for multiple reasons. 1. If I did find a real woman that I was able to speak to, eventually I would have to tell her about Andrea (my doll's name) and that would almost certainly scare her away. 2. I don't think it is possible to find someone that is as accepting of me as she is. 3. The thought of replacing her is more than I can handle. So I guess I will just continue with my weird presumably creepy relationship with an inanimate object. At least I don't feel completely alone any more.
