>>17504909>wild for weeks>To best understand my frame of mind while reading this, go and listen to 'tell me baby.'A bittersweet ending that will be, I don't think I'll make it as Loonanon to that episode. I don't know if I'll be interested. I don't know if I'll be scared of it. Because the unfortunate truth is, Loonanon must die one day, for the new me to emerge. I can already feel it happening, deep down in my head. She's so beautiful, but I've exhausted myself. In a way, the lovable autist you cared for is now dying, and taking his place is someone new. I've grown old and tired of this. The lonely nights, the mindless rambling, the feeling of being unable to share. I persist, however, simply because I am Loonanon. A quiet feeling has overtaken me, the kind that I hoped Loona would help me feel. A sort of comfort in myself. I still have my anxieties and doubts, but I'm getting better by the day. I wish I could stay like this, with loona, forever, but it can't be like that. One day my songs will stop biting, bitter and broken, but still hopeful. I will write whatever I feel, and what I feel won't be emptiness. For so long I have felt this way. I have learned how to love, and by god, I've learned how to grieve.
I think, no, I know Loonanon is dying. I don't know when I'll be dead, as you know me, or how it will happen, but I know it will.
Could be tomorrow, could be in 2 years. It doesn't matter. I've run out of things to say, even outside of this little rant, I don't say many new things. I'm weary, but not weak.
I'm going to take a vacation soon. Hopefully from this place, from Loona, from Loonanon.
It is my bitchin' hours.
