I fart and I belch,
My gas is so stinky it's worth a wealth,
Can you smell my farts, can you hear the sound?
My burps are so loud, they make the ground shake around.

My sneezes are so loud, they echo through the room,
My snot is so sticky, it's hard to get rid of it in a glove,
Can you see my snot, can you feel its texture?
My yawns are so deep, they make me feel like a mystic.

My coughs are so violent, they shake the very air,
My spittle is so gross, it's hard to bear,
Can you see my spittle, can you smell its pungent scent?
My vomit is so gross, it makes me want to quit and lament.

My defecation is so loud, it sounds like thunder,
My poop is so sticky, it's hard to come to a cleaner,
Can you see my poop, can you smell its pungent scent?
My urination is so clear, it makes me feel content.