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>you will never arrive at Mami's apartment for one of the birthdays she spent all on her own, with a big fucking cake and lots of presents that she didn't receive in all those years
>she will never hesitantly open a bit the door, looking at you somehow bemused, with already dry but swollen eyes
>you will never take a step to the side, showing her everything you have brought
>she will never open her mouth to say something in surprise and confusion, slowly starting to weep again, only for then give you the most wonderful and genuine smile you have ever seen from her
>you will never spend the rest of the night in her apartment, brightening her day with each moment you spend together, unwraping the gifts and trying to finish up that big fucking cake before sunrise