>>3486094I developed mental illness in high school that grew completely unchecked all the way up into college. After my third year there, which was spent mostly in my room, naked, smoking pot, reading creepypasta, and trying to find cameras I was convinced had been installed somewhere, I failed almost all my classes and had to drop out. I started taking meds, but they didn't help. I would go up on weekends to visit my friends and drink/smoke/party, and this went up until New Years of 2013/14. The next time I messaged them asking who I could stay with, I was informed I was no longer welcome, but never told why. Over the past five and a half years, I've asked multiple people repeatedly why they all shunned me, but the only answer I got was that this one girl, Rose, really hated me, and convinced everyone else to turn on me for her. It's weird, because Rose was my closest female friend and I shared personal aspects of my life that to date I still haven't shared with anyone else.
Now, I'm 28, fat, jobless, so heavily medicated that can I rarely get through a day without needing to nap, and living with my parents, and I accidentally guilt tripped my far more successful younger brother into not moving out and getting his own place because I cut the fuck out of myself after we had a huge fight and he found out by walking in on it.
