>>3128763here i need to drop a feelspost here so ignore this if you dont want to feel bad
i'm 18 and have been struggling with major depressive disorder for a long time (going on about five or six years though i believe i showed symptoms earlier) and when i first watched madoka i instantly connected with mami and was enamored with how she smiled in the face of adversity and despite everything awful that happened to her she still was a proper lady who maintained responsibility. i've been in unironic love for her for a long time because i need to feel affectionate towards something and mami is an appropriate outlet for that since i'm largely disinterested in dating real people. anyways i tried to kill myself again last thursday night by jumping off a bridge but the cops came and took me to a psychiatric ward for the second time (google baker act) and while i was in there i had a really bad panic attack involving vomiting and crying and inane whispering about how i was going to escape but when they finally got me calmed down i laid on that awful rubber green cot and stared at the ceiling and wondered how mami would think of me, and i told myself that because mami never gave up i wasn't allowed to either and when i got out of the ward i was going to keep reminding myself that i'm worthy of love and affection and she'd tell me the same
shed tell you guys the same too, if youre going through something remember she's there for y ou
pic related i had it commissioned of me and her
i hope its not breaking the rules because im in it but hey it's there
