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Words cannot fucking describe how much I hate hot air balloons.
First of all, they’re fucking terrifying. It combines the fear of falling to your death due to the fact that you ride in a FUCKING WICKER PICNIC BASKET supporting you THOUSANDS OF FEET IN THE AIR. As well as the fear of burning to death because there’s literally a massive open flame above you. You could burn alive, fall to your death, or both in one of these things. Not to mention how fucking stupid and pointless they are. Helicopters and planes serve the SAME exact function, and are better in every single fucking way.
They’re also stupidly inefficient. They top out at around 30 mph. Go hop in a car and lock cruise at 30 mph and realize how fucking slow that is. As well as the fact that there’s NOTHING to protect you from the outside world. It could suddenly start storming while you’re up in one of them, or a bird could decide to fuck with you. At the extreme, a bird could wreck havoc on the balloon. It’s like riding a motorcycle with NONE of the motorcycle fun, and WAY MORE danger than a motorcycle.
Why the fuck do these things exist and why would anyone set foot in one??
