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Tips for getting away with automobile vandalism?

Anonymous Tue 30 Apr 2024 21:45:09 No.1994487 View View Reply Original Report

Quoted By: >>1994582 >>1994593 >>1994608 >>1995038 >>1995097 >>1995471 >>1995502 >>1995787

Hi /n/
I'm a bike commuter and i'm sick of dick head car brains shitting up the already shitty bike lanes
Whats the best way to ensure I don't get caught for slashing a tire, breaking a window, breaking a mirror, or all of the above?
Thanks

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 30 Apr 2024 22:02:07 No.1994495 Report

Quoted By: >>1994499

1. Get therapy
2. Just ride your bike

You won't win against Big Cage if you pick a fight. The police will drop their donuts and hunt you down like Christopher Dorner if word gets out that there's some angry sperg breaking mirrors.

If you need medications to manage your anger, I'm pretty sure they make stuff for that. I find that just riding more fixes everything.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 30 Apr 2024 22:05:35 No.1994499 Report

Quoted By: >>1994503 >>1994510 >>1995479

>>1994495
>1. Get therapy
No
2. Just ride your bike
I do and I love it but dick heads need some punishment every now and then, no? It's why their behavior never changes.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Tue 30 Apr 2024 22:14:12 No.1994503 Report

Quoted By:

>>1994499
They're parking in the bike lane because they correctly see it as the most rational option when no unloading zones were made available, and everyone else is doing it. Breaking their mirror is not going to make them think, "oh, I guess I'd better not drop off my kids at school/the hospital/whatever, because I might force a cyclist to temporarily exit the bike lane". They probably won't even make the connection between their own actions and you breaking their mirror. Your existence simply never registered to them.

Urbanists love talking about "sneckdowns" right? Or how a well worn path through the grass means such-and-such. When a system of rules is put up that conflicts with rational behavior, the rules were not designed well, and you can ignore that fact at your own peril.

This is why you should oppose bike lanes. They do not make you safer. They make you less safe. You probably won't get it, but I tried.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Tue 30 Apr 2024 22:28:14 No.1994510 Report

Quoted By:

>>1994499
This is some retard thinking, when's the last time a car almost swerved into you and you thought "hmmm maybe I WAS acting like an asshole, I should change!"

No chance is even the softest granny gonna take vandalism from a fucking cyclist as a sign for change.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 30 Apr 2024 22:31:53 No.1994512 Report

Quoted By:

just kick in their quarter panel and move on with your life. carrying rage like that is like having poison on an IV-fed drip line.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Wed 01 May 2024 06:47:33 No.1994582 Report

Quoted By:

>>1994487
Use the schrader removal tool, turn anticlockwise about quarter turn, you will waste cagers time to change tyre because they don't carry pumps.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 01 May 2024 08:47:49 No.1994589 Report

Quoted By:

magic rocks.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 01 May 2024 09:14:00 No.1994593 Report

Quoted By: >>1995754

>>1994487
I've seen some videos of people slapping stickers with something like "nice parking on the bike lane!" on the car as they ride their bike. If you're really angry you could use some heavy adhesive like those Russian kids on youtube from a decade ago doing the same thing.
I don't condone this stuff, it's unproductive. We live in a free speech democracy in the information age the best return for your energy and anger is pacifist campaigning. Youll only get arrested if you fight a single cager, but you can have a great impact with a smart campaign. That video by casey neistat crashing on cars was golden.Those videos of sticker slapping usually attract comments of angry cagers and angrier bicyclists and the whole thing gets confrontational and unproductive.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 01 May 2024 09:40:40 No.1994596 Report

Quoted By:

Bolshevik paste a propaganda sign on the back window.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 01 May 2024 11:08:37 No.1994606 Report

Quoted By:

Kick cars while you ride next to them duh

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 01 May 2024 12:01:54 No.1994608 Report

Quoted By:

>>1994487
Just pull up behind the vehicle, lean against it with your hand propping yourself up on the vehicle, and start loudly drumming your fingers until they move.
I guarantee this will send the average driver into a blind rage, but is probably legal in most jurisdictions. Won't send your blood pressure spiking either, since you're taking a breather.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 01 May 2024 12:17:22 No.1994610 Report

Quoted By:

love punching the shit out of side mirrors
also modern plastic front bumpers are fun to kick

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 04 May 2024 13:14:59 No.1995038 Report

Quoted By:

>>1994487
Be black

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 05 May 2024 00:10:26 No.1995097 Report

Quoted By:

>>1994487
I just lift up their wipers to let them know in a nice way that they're being assholes.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 07 May 2024 05:20:48 No.1995471 Report

Quoted By:

>>1994487
If they are in the car, give it a hearty slap on rear quarter panel. They'll hear it reverbate and think they got hit, mist will go check.
If they are not, print some silly stickers like "my car is a bicycle" and slap them on rear driver side window. Small, unintrusive, but noticable when they reach for the door handle.

Anonymous

Anonymous Tue 07 May 2024 06:25:42 No.1995479 Report

Quoted By:

>>1994499
>I do and I love it but dick heads need some punishment every now and then, no?
Not by whatever you have in mind.

>It's why their behavior never changes.
No. It's because you live around dickheads. Though experiment. Take those dickheads and stick them in the train, or on the sidewalk. They're STILL dickheads.

You can't vandalize your way into becoming Japan or the Netherlands.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Tue 07 May 2024 10:22:57 No.1995502 Report

Quoted By:

>>1994487
get motorcycle glovees and punch mirrors
thats what the carbon knuckles are for

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 08 May 2024 11:10:10 No.1995754 Report

Quoted By: >>1996009

>>1994593
yea, mindless vandalism is just counterproductive

picking a fight with a 2 ton piece of machinery is fucking retarded. even if you don't get caught by the police for vandalizing stationary vehicles some vigilante justice idiot is probably going to catch on at some point, especially if you are clearly the angry moron they see riding around all the time.

Anonymous

Anonymous Wed 08 May 2024 13:27:33 No.1995787 Report

Quoted By:

>>1994487
This will not improve society or make people better drivers.
At most you'll just become a boogeyman in these people's heads as a representative phantom of why they should never change anything.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Thu 09 May 2024 16:56:28 No.1996009 Report

Quoted By:

>>1995754
No, the worst thing is messing with an urban gentleman's vehicle. Depending on what you do and the neighborhood you're in you'll be at best be branded a racist or worst, pic related (except that's your head).

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