/out/ - Outdoors » Thread #2349340

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It’s finally that time of year again!

Fecus Innawood Fri 22 Apr 2022 17:05:28 No.2349340 View View Reply Original Report

Quoted By: >>2349446 >>2349466 >>2349477 >>2350785

The thing I hate most about winter is the inability to poop outside comfortably.
Now that spring has come, anybody else excited to take their morning shits in the woods behind their house?
>tips
>tp alternatives
>reading materials
>funny stories

Anonymous

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Anonymous Fri 22 Apr 2022 17:13:18 No.2349343 Report

Quoted By: >>2349362 >>2350005

this is a shitpost

Anonymous

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Anonymous Fri 22 Apr 2022 17:17:34 No.2349346 Report

Quoted By: >>2349350

these guys make handy holes

Anonymous

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Anonymous Fri 22 Apr 2022 17:23:22 No.2349350 Report

Quoted By: >>2349364

Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t dig a hole for toilet paper then use my trowel to fling my turds further into the woods.

>>2349346
Blocks your path

Anonymous

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Anonymous Fri 22 Apr 2022 17:41:33 No.2349362 Report

Quoted By:

>>2349343

Anonymous

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Anonymous Fri 22 Apr 2022 17:42:29 No.2349363 Report

Quoted By: >>2349365

>post yfw you take a shit in a beaver hole and one bites you in the balls

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 22 Apr 2022 17:42:49 No.2349364 Report

Quoted By:

>>2349350
>Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t dig a hole for toilet paper then use my trowel to fling my turds further into the woods.
I give up.
Why shouldn't you dig a hole for toilet paper then use your trowel to fling your turds further into the woods?

Anonymous

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO ow my balls.jpg, 13KiB, 320x240

Anonymous Fri 22 Apr 2022 17:45:17 No.2349365 Report

Quoted By: >>2349367 >>2349378

>>2349363

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 22 Apr 2022 17:47:00 No.2349367 Report

Quoted By:

>>2349365
>NEXT ON THE NATURE CHANNEL !

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 22 Apr 2022 17:54:51 No.2349378 Report

Quoted By:

>>2349365
kek

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 22 Apr 2022 19:02:33 No.2349446 Report

Quoted By: >>2349447 >>2349458

>>2349340
I just sit in the river. Got a fast enough current it'll clean your ass, no need to use your fingers to scrub.

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 22 Apr 2022 19:03:10 No.2349447 Report

Quoted By: >>2349458

>>2349446
I love doing this.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Fri 22 Apr 2022 19:13:31 No.2349458 Report

Quoted By: >>2349468 >>2349472

>>2349446
>>2349447
this is b8.....right? RIGHT?

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 22 Apr 2022 19:19:58 No.2349466 Report

Quoted By:

>>2349340
I guess it wouldn't be /out/ if we didn't have this thread every single day

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 22 Apr 2022 19:21:14 No.2349468 Report

Quoted By:

>>2349458
>he's not pooped in the river
You're missing out. I was skeptical until some anon on here told me about it. I live in a warm environment, so taking a shit in the river also doubles as cooling down, cause you can wait a few mins for the poop to float away then start swimming.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Fri 22 Apr 2022 19:24:04 No.2349472 Report

Quoted By: >>2350031

>>2349458
You don't know?
>the aqua dump
>the river shit
>the log raft
>the stink that won't sink

Anonymous

Anonymous Fri 22 Apr 2022 19:29:50 No.2349477 Report

Quoted By: >>2350143

>>2349340
>tips
>take shovel and tp (wet biodegradable preferred)
>dig out 8x8" square of earth and set aside
>stick shovel in front of hole, use to keep balance if necessary
>squat over hole, do your thing
>notice how it just falls out, no pressing necessary
>wipe
>notice how there's barely any shit
>get up, fix pants, cover up hole
>done

>don't alternative tp, it's a severe loss of hygiene and comfort for nonexistant savings

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 03:31:10 No.2350005 Report

Quoted By:

>>2349343

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 04:43:59 No.2350031 Report

Quoted By: >>2350441

>>2349472
I did take a shit in a lake once. It did sink. Good, compact turds sink.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 09:53:36 No.2350143 Report

Quoted By: >>2350165 >>2350235

>>2349477
>needs support to squat
Just how fucking fat are you?

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 10:52:28 No.2350165 Report

Quoted By: >>2350315

>>2350143
not fat at all, skinny in fact, but if you aren't used to squatting you can't get down without falling over lol

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 13:08:54 No.2350235 Report

Quoted By:

>>2350143
Not him but I'd rather get a good, deep squat and focus on shitting rather than worrying about my form. Also, it could help a lot in less-than-ideal terrain.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 14:47:58 No.2350301 Report

Quoted By:

Pro-tip - take a piss normal first... Then pop your squat.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 15:17:35 No.2350315 Report

Quoted By: >>2350392 >>2350395

>>2350165
>but if you aren't used to squatting you can't get down without falling over lol
I work at a gym and deal with people who never squat on a daily, they don't need support. Only ones I ever see needing support are fatties and elderly.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 17:04:44 No.2350392 Report

Quoted By: >>2350405 >>2350426

>>2350315
Well now you got to know a skinny fuck that falls over backwards if he squats down all the way without holding onto something

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 17:06:34 No.2350395 Report

Quoted By: >>2350405

>>2350315
arent you the kid who got kicked out of the military for failing PT

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 17:20:32 No.2350405 Report

Quoted By: >>2350416

>>2350392
How often do you stretch? What sort of shoes are you wearing? Stretch more and try going with either barefooted or shouted that don't have much lift or else ot screws your form up.
>>2350395
>kid
I'm almost 40.
>Kicked out of the military.
Sorry, never been a welfare queen.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 17:30:55 No.2350416 Report

Quoted By:

>>2350405
>How often do you stretch?
Daily, but not doing squats because when you suck at them you avoid them lol

>What sort of shoes are you wearing?
Trail running shoes most of the time, but also got vibro barefoot shoes

>Stretch more
I'm working on it, sitting all front at a desk fucks with you on unreal levels

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 17:42:44 No.2350426 Report

Quoted By: >>2350490

>>2350392
consider training core and leg strength. If you cant carry your own body weight you shouldn't be legally considered human.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 17:43:37 No.2350428 Report

Quoted By: >>2350434 >>2350473 >>2350476

I'm gonna be honest I've never dug a shit hole. I just wander off trail, drop trou and poop. Then pile up dirt and leaves overtop.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 17:49:44 No.2350434 Report

Quoted By: >>2350436

>>2350428
If you're homeless and the trail is a park in NW Oregon, I need to know your current location.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 17:51:23 No.2350436 Report

Quoted By: >>2350444

>>2350434
He's not going to fuck you, anon.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 17:55:39 No.2350441 Report

Quoted By:

>>2350031
You're eating too much meat if your shit just rafts away

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 18:01:05 No.2350444 Report

Quoted By: >>2350540

>>2350436
that's fine, I was planning on fucking him. With a screwdriver.

Fecus Innawood

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Fecus Innawood Sat 23 Apr 2022 18:34:27 No.2350473 Report

Quoted By:

>>2350428
This.

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 18:39:26 No.2350476 Report

Quoted By:

>>2350428
I just poop on trail and don't cover it.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 18:53:36 No.2350490 Report

Quoted By: >>2350537

>>2350426
I can carry myself, easily. I used to ride the bike a lot and have good leg strength. It's just that my tendons are not stretched enough to facilitate squatting down with feet on the ground without tipping back.

Anonymous

Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 19:54:33 No.2350537 Report

Quoted By: >>2350545

>>2350490
the non-wipe effect is ENHANCED by using a spade to balance, you squat MORE than you could have normally, spreading your butt cheeks even more than if you had to use those muscles alone

also the main reason people have better shits camping and hiking is because they are actually MOVING their entire body for long periods of time, something your intestines and stomach thank you for with solid, well digested shits(as long as you don't drink the water)

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 19:58:16 No.2350540 Report

Quoted By:

>>2350444
poopoo peepee but literally

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 20:02:08 No.2350545 Report

Quoted By:

>>2350537
>ENHANCED
>MORE
>MOVING
Are you trying to morse signal torture with you eye blinks or some shit?

Anonymous

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Anonymous Sat 23 Apr 2022 23:33:04 No.2350723 Report

Quoted By:

>be me
>ate some hot calzone with habaneros last night
>today
>go geocaching with gf for the first time(it's her first, my second)
>after the first cache, I get some pain in my stomach with the feeling of diarrhea approaching
>tell her about it, as we walk down some trail
>at some point it the feeling gets so bad, I cannot hold it in anymore
>take off my jacket as fast as I can
>hold this
>quickly move to some trees while trying not to shit myself
>i pull down my pants
>hold onto a curved tree in a way so I can avoid shitting on myself
>push out a fountain of diarrhea and a lot of air
>brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrppppffffpppfppfp
>wipe ass with tissues
>gf laughing
>thank her for making sure nobody is coming seeing me
>we continue our geocaching trip

>picrel is my latest geocache

Anonymous

Anonymous Sun 24 Apr 2022 01:56:25 No.2350785 Report

Quoted By:

>>2349340
Use your rope tied around your balls, /tits, crawl over the side of the moutain,extend legs and T pose right on the side, shit in what ever direction your ass is.

For TP, don't wipe and finish hike with ur pants down

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