>>4243847Just call it a phallus because most dudes use it as such. Reminder that the phallus is a depiction of the penis to represent the abstract idea of masculinity; this lends itself easily to cameras.
Penis-1 is the highest-quality camera; the gearfags drool over this
Penis-2, -3 are hobbyist- and beginner-level cameras
I would abolish brands, but camerists like to dick-wave over that, too, so we'll have to keep them. All of them should refer to their cameras using phallic imagery; the lenses should be measured not by focal length and aperture, but by length and circumference. Needlessly large lenses will abound as many will want the largest phallus. My camera has a 6"x9" lens.
Megapixels are now referred to as dixels. The more you have, the better. I like this anon's
>>4244046 idea of putting it in the nomenclature so everyone knows you have the most dixels. Penis-1,40; Penis-2,24.
Focus is no longer soft or sharp, but soft or hard. Expressed in the lens nomenclature to tell you how fast the autofocus is (how quickly does it get hard?) and how sharp the detail is (how hard does it get?). An abbreviation is fine; something like Q for Quick and RH for Rock Hard. 6"x9" QRH
So you'd have, for example, a Penis-1,50 with a 9"x10" VFRH lens. Absolutely perfect for everyone to know that they're shopping for surrogate dicks.
