Quoted By:
>Match 1: "The World's Strongest Clown" Sammy Guevara vs. "The Bearded Lady" Nyla Rose
Sammy comes out dressed as a clown with a weightlifting bar, while Nyla enters the ring with a full beard and top hat. The match is a comedy of errors, with Sammy struggling to lift the bar while Nyla tries to use her beard as a weapon. Nyla goes over
>Match 2: "The Goat" Chris Jericho vs. Briscoe in a Chicken Coop Brawl
Next up,Jericho and Briscoe face off in a chicken coop brawl. The ring is set up inside a giant chicken coop, with live chickens clucking and running around the outside. The only way to win is to pin your opponent inside the coop.
>Match 3: The Accalimed and FTR for the tag titles in a Steel Cage Match on a battleship, with the only way to win being to escape the cage and jump into the water.
>Match 4: Hayter vs Shida in a Bayou Brawl Match for the womens title
Hayter finds herself in a brutal fight against Shida in a murky swamp, filled with alligators, snakes, and other dangerous creatures. hayter retains as shida is pulled into the swamp by Luchasaurus in a jason esque swamp attire
>Main Event: MJF v. Wardlow: The main event is the most politically charged match of the night, as MJF represents the communist regime in Cuba, while Wardlow represents American democracy. The two engage in a brutal battle, with both men using their own propaganda to sway the crowd. MJF uses his cunning and manipulation to gain an early advantage, but Wardlow fights back with his heart and spirit. In the end, Wardlow pulls off the victory, powerbombing MJF throug a commie flag with his face on it, solidifying himself as the ultimate symbol of American freedom. The crowd chants "USA! USA!" as Wardlow holds the title high above his head, and MJF slinks away in defeat.
Tony gimme the fucking book, I'l sabe your show
