I've become so much like Cody Rhodes it's scary.
I wear tailor fitted suits, got a dumb neck tattoo, and ask people "so...what do you guys wanna talk about?".
When I go look for prostitutes, I can't help but think "black women only" (my penis only responds to ebony queens)
Whenever I get home from banging black prostitutes I always ask my mother to light off fireworks to simulate my bombastic entrance.
If she ever comes down into the basement and asks me to get a job I simply insist that I need to finish the story and refuse to elaborate.
When I see men with non-black women I get mad at them for not being as enlightened as I am.
When I walk down the street I simply must take my belt off, kiss it and hand it to the nearest person.
I will one day inherit the title of the American Nightmare.
