Hello everyone, and welcome to the seventh installment of /pw/'s resident wrestling show, SATURDAY NIGHT METAL. This show is brought to you by the friendly autists here at K-WAB Wrestling, and that stands for Kino Wrestling for Autistic Bastards. We took a little hiatus last week, which will be a normal occurrence every 4-5 episodes. This allows me and my brother LyricKING time to handle IRL matters and also to make improvements in the show. Speaking of which, King has now been officially made the new Vice President of K-WAB Wrestling. As of this episode, we are no longer using vocaroo for anything, as catbox files are much more permanent. I am also pleased to announce that we have secured a small amount of funding which will allow us to purchase some better equipment. So stick with us anons, because this shit is only going to get better and better. Now, without further ado, let's talk about tonight's card. Here's what's on the menu tonight:
>Ultimo Dragon Vs The Great Muta >Tessa Blanchard Vs Liv Morgan (Give Up Or Get Out Match) >The Invaders Vs The Scurvy Dogs (Tornado Tag Match) >"Stone Cold" Steve Austin Vs The Booty Man >David Benoit Vs Kane in a No-Holds-Barred Match with the Gigadimes title on the line! PLUS:
>WOLFIE IN WRESTLER'S COURT (you don't want to miss this one, folks) >An update from Raja Jackson >The long-awaited meeting between Pepe Von Erich and Captain Confederate >The unveiling of our new tag team title belts >A special surprise As you will see, we got a great show for you tonight, folks. So kick back and immerse yourself in a world of unbridled autistic KINO. It's all coming up next on Saturday Night Metal, which can only be found here on /pw/.
>Show Intro Theme: https://files.catbox.moe/yforxs.mp3 >Official K-WAB Channel: https://www.bitchute.com/channel/ANkif28xbBNW >Official K-WAB Email Address: [email protected]
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Just to let everyone know, this show may take a little longer than usual tonight. Bitchute has been having trouble with large uploads this week, and the "Wolfie in Wrestler's Court" video is the largest one I've done yet. As such, it is still uploading and I don't know exactly when it will be done. However, while that particular segment may be delayed, the show will proceed as planned and the segment will be posted as soon as possible. We thank all of our dedicated fans for your patience. Now, enough of that shit, let's start the show.
Anonymous
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FUCK YEAH!!!! HERE WE GOOOOOOO!!!
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Independence Day Rumble:
https://archive.palanq.win/pw/thread/18159930/ Saturday Night Metal Ep. 1:
https://archive.palanq.win/pw/thread/18232795/ Saturday Night Metal Ep. 2:
https://archive.palanq.win/pw/thread/18303396/ Saturday Night Metal Ep. 3:
https://archive.palanq.win/pw/thread/18636314/ Saturday Night Metal Ep. 4:
https://archive.palanq.win/pw/thread/18700473/ Saturday Night Metal Ep. 5:
https://archive.palanq.win/pw/thread/18761416/ Saturday Night Metal Ep. 6:
https://archive.palanq.win/pw/thread/18812145 Our last episode began with a bilingual promo from Shingo and Flair. Next we had Rey Mysterio and Mistico putting on a banger of a match, with Mistico getting the win. Next came a little update from Apu News regarding the Hulkster, HHH, and our upcoming gigashow Samhain Sacrifice. Up next, we rolled out K-WAB Wrestling's first Royal Rumble, which was won by David Benoit. We continued with The Pajeets of Pain Vs The Road Warriors. After getting clobbered by a trash can from the Insane Clown Posse sitting at ringside, Subhojeet Mukherjee fell from the top rope and ate the pin. Next was a quick phone call between myself and the crazy homicidal redneck known as Captain Confederate, during which we set up a meeting. Next, Steve Austin was beaten half to death by a 450-pound gorilla named Harambe. Thankfully, the match was stopped before he suffered serious injury. Our good friend Grug began his interview with the Ultimate Warrior, and then we got to the main event: Ric Flair Vs Shingo Takagi for the World Heavyweight Championship. After an epic contest, Flair got the win with a devastating table piledriver and became our first world champion. After the show went off the air, a certain anon in the crowd began trying to spread false accusations about yours truly in an attempt to sabotage the fed. After some intelligent deduction from our loyal fans, this anon was revealed to be none other than Wolfie. As such, Wolfie will face justice in wrestler's court.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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By virtue of his stunning victory in last week's Royal Rumble, the crazed crippler David Benoit has earned a shot at the K-WAB Gigadimes Championship. Both competitors requested that this match be contested with no DQ, no countout, and no rope breaks. These are two of the craziest bastards in a company with no shortage of such, so you don't want to miss tonight's main event!
Anonymous
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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And here is David Benoit with a few words about his match later tonight.
https://www.bitchute.com/video/diIBWAkaE6KI Frenly Apu !!ojHh2GMfBkG
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ladies and gentlemen, it appears that a member of the K-WAB roster has recently been arrested! Yes, Raja Jackson had only just recovered from his fiery near-death at the hands of Kane when the police scooped him up. Obviously, he will be facing felony charges for his brutal assault on indie wrestler Syko Stu. So, what does this mean for his future in the ring? At present, the answer to that question is uncertain. President Von Erich tells me that he might be able to arrange some sort of work release for Raja, which would allow him to return on a limited basis. However, nothing can be done until Raja has his next court hearing so it looks like Raja won't be coming back just yet. We will continue to keep you updated regarding this matter. Back to you, President Von Erich
Frenly Apu !!ojHh2GMfBkG
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>>18926346 Glad to see you're enjoying the show sir! Feel free to enjoy the complimentary booze and whores in the VIP section.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Ladies and gentlemen, this contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Nagoya, Japan, weighing 185 pounds...ladies and gentlemen, this is Ultimo Dragon!
Entrance Video:
https://www.bitchute.com/video/UeaenXozART6 Entrance Theme:
https://files.catbox.moe/jjt80x.mp3 Anonymous
Quoted By:
Absolute bangers so far
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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And his opponent...from the land of the rising sun, weighing 219 pounds...he is the grand wizard of puro, The Great Muta!
Entrance Video:
https://www.bitchute.com/video/eIKu2lPxwPAf Entrance Theme:
https://files.catbox.moe/04veha.mp3 Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Now this next one is a match that a proper southern gentleman like myself can understand...we got the grand wizard and the grand dragon duking it out for the supremacy of the Nippon KKK.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Time to get started with match number one! As part of our ongoing efforts to build the cruiserweight division, we give you Ultimo Dragon Vs The Great Muta.
https://www.bitchute.com/video/qZFInhTPJrsa Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Here is your winner, the Grand Dragon of the Nippon KKK, Ultimo Dragon!
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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I think this is a good time to make a few announcements. First of all, I have come to a decision regarding animals in K-WAB Wrestling (such as Harambe and Jim Cornette's pet bear). The bear was partially responsible for Hulk Hogan's recent injury, and Harambe would have beaten Steve Austin to death last week if it weren't for the timely intervention of our new referee Mario. And so, I am beginning to think that maybe I need to be more careful about using these dangerous wild creatures. I certainly cannot use them in the same way as a human worker. Thus, I have decided that animals will no longer be eligible to compete for any championships in K-WAB Wrestling except for the Gigadimes title. The Gigadimes title is open to all competitors, so I can't rightly exclude them from contention for that title. Now, there will be one exception made for Scurvy Pierre, but that's ONLY because he is a sasquatch and has a human intellect. He's actually smarter than some people I know, so he's basically a big hairy human and can still compete for the tag titles along with his partner. As for Harambe, he will be transferring to a security role while also continuing to wrestle part-time. If there's one thing we can learn from his recent match, it is this: You do NOT fuck with Harambe. Stone Cold is still a little angry with me for booking that match, so I gave him an easy one this week. After this, he better shut the fuck up and quit complaining.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
And now we come to an even bigger announcement. My good friend Beltmaker Pepe delivered a stunning set of tag team championship belts to my office this morning. There is no need to show both of the belts because they are identical, so feast your eyes on our new K-WAB TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIPS. The first tag champions will be crowned before long, but we do not yet have a complete design for the cruiserweight championship or the women's championship. If any of you would like to submit some designs or ideas for these belts, feel free to do so in this thread or at the email in the OP . Once we have a good design, I can send it to Beltmaker Pepe and get our other two titles squared away.
Anonymous
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>>18926682 absolutely beautiful
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Ladies and gentlemen, this contest will be a "submit or toss" match. To win, a competitor must either force the other competitor to submit or throw them over the top rope. Introducing first, from Charlotte, North Carolina, weighing 125 pounds...she is the undeniable diamond, Tessa Blanchard!
Entrance Video:
https://www.bitchute.com/video/R6pyonqhKtix Entrance Theme:
https://files.catbox.moe/ke0aot.mp3 Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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And her opponent...from Elmwood Park, New Jersey, weighing 117 pounds...say hello to Liv Morgan!
Entrance Video:
https://www.bitchute.com/video/1PLGfYiwac7A Entrance Theme:
https://files.catbox.moe/5e06g1.mp3 Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
And now we have Tessa Blanchard Vs Liv Morgan competing in a new and experimental match type. This will be the first-ever "give up or get out" match, which means there are no pinfalls. Competitors can win either by submission or by throwing their opponent over the top rope. Hopefully Liv forgot to wear panties.
https://www.bitchute.com/video/Exuu0tm1dWZX Anonymous
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I wanna see the boat movie
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Here is your winner by way of tossout, Liv Morgan!
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Alright Cap, I have followed your directions precisely and they have led me to a dead end.>hold on bossman, I got me a secret entrance
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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>Pepe Von Erich Nice little hideout you got here, son. Now I see why you were so hard to find, and why you gunned down three of my retarded talent scouts to protect your secrecy.>Captain Confederate Well lemme tell ya somethin bossman, Captain Confederate is waging a one-man war on all the enemies of the south! And I'm sorry about them scouts but I can't take the risk of them yankee faggots findin' the Dixiecave and puttin' me in prison for all the hate crimes I've committed! And yes I did 'em all, in case you're wonderin'. And that's why I'm thinkin' that I need to lay low and let things blow over for a bit, and this rasslin' job might be the perfect cover. I always wanted to be a rassler anyways. But I gotta warn you bossman, I am the craziest sumbitch this trailer park has ever seen and I'm fixin' to prove it when I step in that ring, by God.>Pepe Von Erich So you're in?>Captain Confederate Yeah but there's just one thing. I'm gonna be sellin' moonshine in that locker room so don't you rat me out or I'll kill ya lil' froggy ass.>Pepe Von Erich Shit son, I don't give a damn how much moonshine you sell, I might even buy some. Ok, that sounds like a deal to me, sign here please...
Anonymous
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Ladies and gentlemen, this contest is scheduled for one fall and will be a special tornado tag match. Introducing first, from San Lorenzo, at a total combined weight of 444 pounds...they are the notorious locker room stabbers, Invader #1 and Invader #2, The Invaders!
Entrance Video:
https://www.bitchute.com/video/4FoxrGNq6CRT Entrance Theme:
https://files.catbox.moe/3o02vf.mp3 Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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And their opponents...from the sleaze pits of Tortuga, at a total combined weight of 525 pounds...they are the plunderers of the seven seas, Scurvy Pierre and Scurvy Dheeg, The Scurvy Dogs!
Entrance Video:
https://www.bitchute.com/video/P6SUBOyDoEQd Entrance Theme:
https://files.catbox.moe/wgnmmq.mp3 Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
>you pendejos will suffer the same fate as that fucking maricone Bruiser Brody AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Alright, now we got the stabby Puerto Ricans against the pirates in a hardcore tornado tag extravaganza!
https://www.bitchute.com/video/s0QQrtS5Xhu9 Anonymous
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>>18927058 >giving invader 1 a freddy krueger gimmick I like it lmao
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Here are your winners, the Scurvy Dogs!
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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We now take you to this quick word from our sponsors
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Yo, listen up dweebs! It's me, Big Sexy Kevin Nash. As you may know, I was, uh, brutally raped in the summer of 92. Needless to say, I was pretty upset when Mabel and the boys finally finished with me. I needed something to take my mind off the burning pain in my asshole, so I decided to go buy some pot. Unfortunately my pot dealer was black and so he just took my money and raped me again. So, with my asshole even more inflamed than before, I wandered into the local vape shop. The proprietor was a very nice gay gentleman who said he was quite familiar with this problem, and he gave me the strongest vape he had on hand. Unfortunately, that didn't help either and I spent the next three days screaming in pain and praying for the sweet release of death. But when I had finally made it through this terrible ordeal I realized that I had to create the strongest CBD/THC vape ever produced, because I knew only a super-powerful dose of cannabinoids would be enough to provide quick anal relief for a perpetual rape victim like myself. And the best part is, Kevin Nash vapes are now available to the general public for a nominal fee. Get a clue and buy one today! The next time your local thugs catch you alone in the alleyway and give you the business, just reach for that Kevin Nash vape and you'll feel better in no time. And the next time you walk into your local vape shop, Just remember this little jingle: >When you get raped >by a pack of apes >just reach for >that Kevin Nash vape
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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>YO YO YO it's ya boy, the legendary Top Dolla! And I'm here to tell you all about my dope new rasslin school yo! Now you can learn the skills that made me the respected ring technician that I am today. When I made that terrible botch, I thought my career was over man, but now I got a whole new career jobbing on the indies, and its phat bro I got all the hot dogs I can eat! And if you want, I can also teach you to be a successful rap musician for a small extra fee, homie. so bring yo ass on down to Top Dolla's Rasslin Academy and learn it straight from the GOAT himself, and that's me son! Ric Flair? Hulk Hogan? Antonio Inoki? Andre the Giant? THEY AIN'T SHIT. If you want to become the master of the TOP DOLLA FLOP like me, then call that number on the screen right now! Seriously, CALL THAT SHIT I need the money yo...
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
>HI, IM SENSATIONAL SHERRIIIIII! AND I WANNA TELL YOUUUU ABOUT MY FAVORITE RECIPE! IT'S SENSATIONAL SHERRI'S FAMOUS PIZZA SPAGHETTIIII! YOU JUST FRY THE PEPPERONI, PUT IT IN THE SPAGHETTI, ADD SOME PIZZA SAUCE AND SPICES AND A BUNCH OF CHEEEEEEEESE! LIFE ON THE ROAD IS HARD AND I DON'T HAVE TIME TO TAKE A SHIIIIIT! BUT WHEN YOU EAT SENSATIONAL SHERRI'S PIZZA SPAGHETTI, YOU WON'T SHIT FOR AT LEAST A WEEEEEEK. AND THEN WHEN YOU DO, IT'LL BE AN EXPLOSIVE NUCLEAR SHIT THAT WILL RUIN YOUR TOILET BOOOOOOWL AND MAKE YOUR NEIGHBORS MOVE AWAAAAAAY!! AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! NOW, you can make Sensational Sherri's world-famous pizza spaghetti at home, but if you want the real thing JUST CALL ME AT THE SENSATIONAL SHERRI CATERING COMPANY! WHERE WE SELL NOTHING BUT PIZZA SPAGHETTI, PIZZA SPAGHETTI, AND MOOOOORE PIZZA SPAGHEEEEETTTIIIIIII!
Anonymous
>>18927190 HOLY FUCKING DIMES!!
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Ladies and gentlemen, this contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Victoria, Texas, weighing 252 pounds...he is the Texas rattlesnake, "Stone Cold" Steve Austin!
Entrance Video:
https://www.bitchute.com/video/2fg8pye5ebIz Entrance Theme:
https://files.catbox.moe/hfzsvi.mp3 Anonymous
>>18927221 I unironically make this all the time
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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>>18927242 You can thank LyricKING for that one lol, 92 material is his specialty.
Anonymous
You should have a division with it's own belt for all the various boogeymen of /pw/. There are enough of them at this point that you could fill an entire card with them kek
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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And his opponent...from San Francisco, California, weighing 272 pounds...he is God's biggest mistake...The Boooooty Man!
Entrance Video:
https://www.bitchute.com/video/AVnRU40bYz9H Entrance Theme:
https://files.catbox.moe/lk9dhl.mp3 Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
>>18927255 All jokes aside, I have been meaning to try it myself. After posting about it so many times I feel like I might as well give it a try.
>>18927277 At least some of them will eventually be brought in, but I am hesitant to attract all the schizos on the board to a single thread. It could bring about the end of the world. But just so you know there's a long list of meme/board characters that will be added over time. Each CAW takes a long time so I have to add people slowly.
Anonymous
>>18927288 Hey no worries, don't burn yourself out. I know these kind of things can get tedious at a certain point. I always look forward to this thread though, it's a nice bit of fun for sure.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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>What in the hell is up with this fruity sumbitch? >Son, I'm really gonna enjoy openin' up a can of whoop ass on you!
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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>>18927296 Glad to hear you like it, and loyal fans like you are why I plan to keep doing this for years to come. As for this episode, I didn't really get burned out as much as I just overplanned. I tried to deliver too much at once and it didn't all get done but I think it's working out fine. There's still plenty enough to make this a good one.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
And now we continue tonight's matchups with Steve Austin Vs The Booty Man! I don't book a lot of jobber matches but this one turned out alright, and there is a special surprise in the video as well.
https://www.bitchute.com/video/LJHa0Ww9WmC4 Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Alright everyone, it finally got done uploading. This is easily my longest and most complex segment yet, and I think you will find it highly amusing. I give you...WOLFIE IN WRESTLER'S COURT!
https://www.bitchute.com/video/9cC4eRXkm1mf Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Ladies and gentlemen, here is your winner...Steve Austin!>YEAH SON I done stomped a mudhole in your ass and that's just what ol' Stone Cold needed!
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Here's a little celebration video for stone cold, just so we can watch him piledrive this jabroni over and over lol
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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>Hey Steve, I really hate to interrupt your celebration and all...but I guess you didn't see the ruling that just came down from wrestler's court! We got a wolfbitch to R so if you don't mind...we'd like to commandeer that ring from you.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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>Well that's just fine with ol' Stone Cold, I already done had my fun and since you asked all polite I guess I'll give up this ring instead of whoopin both ya asses and givin both of yall the stunner! Have fun boys!
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Ladies and gentlemen, this contest is scheduled for one fall, and it will be a special HANDICAP KWAB MATCH! Introducing first, from parts unknown, weighing 122 pounds..the only person who doesn't believe Kevin Nash was raped in the sizzling hot summer of 1992, WOLFIE!
Entrance Video:
https://www.bitchute.com/video/793ecBpVpqI4 Entrance Theme:
https://files.catbox.moe/hnpill.mp3 Anonymous
>>18927514 Let's kill Wolfie!
>clap clap clap-clap-clap Let's kill Wolfie!
>clap clap clap-clap-clap Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
>>18927514 Alright, everyone...you wanted Bryan Vs Wolfie and here it is. However, I brought in Eddie Guerrero to lend a hand because a singles match just isn't enough of a KWAB for this situation. This will be the first of the seven deadly KWABs that Wolfie must endure in the coming weeks. Let it never be said that K-WAB Wrestling does not deliver for its loyal fans.
https://www.bitchute.com/video/f0Xilnr7W5y8 Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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>>18927542 As decreed by the court, Wolfie will suffer 7 deadly KWABs, each more terrible than the last. This handicap match is only the beginning, we're going to be abusing him for weeks lol.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Ok y'all, it's been a great show full of surprises but I still got one more thing to drop...and that is our MAIN EVENT! Kane and David Benoit will meet in just a few minutes and fight it out with the Gigadimes Championship on the line!
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Ladies and gentlemen, this contest is scheduled for one fall, and it will be a no-holds-barred match for the K-WAB Gigadimes Championship! Introducing first, the challenger... from Edmonton, Canada, weighing 220 pounds...he is the crazed crippler, David Benoit!
Entrance Video:
https://www.bitchute.com/video/xsLaq4ARvC6x Entrance Theme:
https://files.catbox.moe/0pigk8.mp3 Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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And his opponent...from parts unknown, weighing 323 pounds...he is your K-WAB Gigadimes champion...the big red machine, KANE!
Entrance Video:
https://www.bitchute.com/video/018cRcWo0nyB Entrance Theme:
https://files.catbox.moe/o85wjn.mp3 Anonymous
Quoted By:
>>18927575 KWAB WOLFIE IN TEARS AGAIN
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
It's time for the MAIN EVENT! By winning the rumble last week, David Benoit earned a shot at Kane and the K-WAB Gigadimes Championship. Which of these psychotic individuals will leave the 4chan arena with the belt?
https://www.bitchute.com/video/WYoYU4teCXWs Anonymous
Quoted By:
>>18927692 >a 92 post for the main event EPIC
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Ladies and gentlemen, the referee has declared this match to be a no-contest, as both competitors are unable to continue.
Anonymous
>>18927692 >ITS SOME SORTA APPARITION OF THE SUPERNATURAL! Interesting main event. I think David could have won that. Whose side was Taker on??
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Ladies and gentlemen, we have just witnessed a spectacle from beyond this world! The Undertaker and Paul Bearer used some kind of voodoo magic spell to paralyze both competitors, but they seem to be alright now. Some of the fans are helping them up, and I'm sure these people will never forget what they've seen here today. This thing between Kane and the Undertaker is gonna have to be settled before long, I can't have demons and shit disrupting my show like this.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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>>18927731 Well, since both of the competitors were KO'd by the demonic apparition that we just saw, it is safe to assume that the Undertaker is no friend to either one of these men. He clearly has his own agenda and only time will tell what that may be. He did explain part of that agenda in episode 1 but I will tell you there is much more to be revealed.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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Well ladies and gentlemen, this is our first 6-match card and it seems to have gone fairly well. It did make things harder but all of these matches had to happen for one reason or another. Here's a quick look at tonight's match results.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
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And now it's time to introduce a new feature. From now on, each show will include a quick look at the contender list for all four divisions. This list is primarily used to determine who will get title shots and who will not, but it also allows you to get an idea of where the various competitors stand in their pursuit of the various titles. The full list includes more than 10 slots per division, but I don't think there's a need to publish the entire list every week. As a general rule, nobody gets a title shot unless they're in the top ten for that division. You may have noticed that one competitor (Shingo) is ranked in both the heavyweight and cruiserweight divisions. This is because Shingo just happens to weigh exactly 220 pounds. Those who have this exact weight are allowed to compete in both divisions, as they are right on the dividing line. Anyone above 220 cannot compete in the cruiserweight division and anyone below 220 cannot compete in the heavyweight division. As you can see, there are still a lot of vacant spots to be filled, but things are coming along nicely. Tonight, the changes to our contender list include:>Ultimo Dragon won the vacant #6 spot in the cruiserweight division >Liv Morgan won the vacant #2 spot in the women's division >The Scurvy Dogs won the vacant #6 spot in the tag team division >Steve Austin won the vacant #14 spot in the heavyweight division >Wolfie Vs Bryan/Eddie had no effect on the rankings because it was a handicap match. >The main event had no effect on the rankings because it ended in a no-contest
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
NEXT TIME ON SATURDAY NIGHT METAL: There has been no firm decision on the main event as yet, and I am always open to suggestions, but our other four matches will be tag team matches. The winners of these four tag matches will go on to compete in a special kind of contest the following week. The team that emerges victorious from this 2-week affair will be crowned as our first tag team champions. There are 6 teams on the contender list as of now, but the MAGA Powers cannot compete because the Hulkster is still out with a neck injury. So, with a total of 8 teams involved that leaves three slots to be determined. As usual, more information will be announced in the friday night preview thread. As always, you can expect plenty of KINO , plenty of chaos, and plenty of good old fashioned carny fun on the next episode of Saturday Night Metal.
Anonymous
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Great show, PVE.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
Ladies and gentlemen, this concludes our broadcast for the evening. It has certainly been a strange and chaotic night, to say the least. We've had psychopaths, murderers, a French Canadian sasquatch pirate, a very amusing trial followed by a savage beating, Liv Morgan's twat hanging out, and even a demonic horror from the nether regions. It just goes to show that anything can happen around here. Once again, thank you everyone for coming out to enjoy this little autistic circus, and we will see you again next time. For K-WAB Wrestling and Dimes Bros. Productions, this is Pepe Von Erich signing off.
Anonymous
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>>18927990 loved every bit of it OP, please keep cookin
Anonymous
Anonymous
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>>18926796 hate to see my girl tessa get tossed but at least liv showed us her digital fish taco in the process
Anonymous
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I was out drinking all night and missed the show I'll catch up now
Anonymous
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>>18927692 KWAB!!
Kek has blessed this main event!
Anonymous
Best thread on this board. Up there with Weekend Webm Bro. wolfie in shambles off pissing up a storm and dumping in his nappy. Can't wait for BIG KING MABEL'S retribution. Incredible show.
Anonymous
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>>18926682 Gorgeous design.
Love how the center blue globe hearkens back to the tag belts of yesteryear. Love the classic old school choice of strap design.
More prestigious than AEW belts, that's for damn sure.
Anonymous
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>>18927575 EAT LITERAL HORSESHIT, WOLFBITCH!!
WE MAKING WAAAAAAVES!!!
Anonymous
Anonymous
>>18927940 Pepe, I'm not sure if you are still here, but this show truly needs more Undertaker matches. I know, the last time we saw him, he had the short straw against Kane, but I still believe in the Deadman. I would also suggest Taker to compete for the World Heavyweight title in the far future, when the times right.
Anyway, I'm looking forward for the next big show. Peace.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
>>18929872 Not to worry, my friend. The Undertaker is definitely a part of my future plans as he is involved in a couple of important storylines right now. Obviously I can't give out any spoilers regarding belts and matches, but I can assure you that there is a definite plan for him. As you can see in this episode, his feud with Kane is far from over.
Anonymous
>>18930421 Sounds great. I did the mistake of asking before watching the match but now that I saw it, I'm hyped for the next chapter of the two brothers.
Anonymous
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>>18927337 looks like raja is a pretty popular guy in the cell block lol
Anonymous
>>18930473 me too, this shit may not be real but the narrative is good so i'm invested in it now.
Anonymous
>>18931124 Still better whatever story WWE or AEW is producing.
Anonymous
>>18931159 agree, I really don't know why these million dollar companies like WWE and AEW can't seem to write a good plot. with all that money youd think they could find and hire some top tier creative people but for some reason they cant.
Anonymous
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>>18931284 nepotism. they don't want to hire the most creative people, they just want to hire and promote their buddies/favorites.
Anonymous
>>18928848 i can't wait to see wolfie's other 6 KWABS
Anonymous
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>>18931815 Wrestler's Court segments are over with me too, brother. Can't wait to see you else gets put on trial and who will actually bring forth a bottle of Jack to get out of sentencing.
Anonymous
>>18931815 >>18931815 And you know what? It's justified. Because wolfpedo DID show up here posting blatant nonsense. He DID accuse the owner of being a jungle monkey pedophile, both in the previous thread and him and his troon squad spammed the board with it. He did show up and start spouting fucking bullshit while a bunch of his buttfucking lackey never will be women smelly discord TRANNIES show up and shit up the place with him cause they introduced him to his girlfriend with the smooth feminine penis he brags about sucking on all the time. Even Nash was in the fucking crowd at that trial; notice he didn't spring up to his defense? Cause he's man enough to have admitted it happened and he just wanted to watch the cringe unfold over the creep shoot pedophile that's been whiteknight m'lady defending him on this board for years. Even Nash was like, "Bitch? Get a fucking life."
Can't wait for New Jack to staple wolfston's tongue to the turnbuckle pad.
Anonymous
>>18931979 kek now that's well said sir. Isn't it odd that wolfie hasn't showed up at all in this thread? I mean, this is literally the first K-WAB thread that hasn't included him spamming his accusations. As soon as people recognized him, he's too scared to show up anymore.
Anonymous
>>18932028 He's keeping his head down because people called him out for being bitchtits/iyoschizo in the last kwab thread. Wolfie always turtles when iyoschizo is mentioned because that's who he is with no gimmick.
Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
>>18932069 Correct. That's why I added that little bit about Iyo in the wrestler's court segment. That's actually my favorite part, it makes me kek every time and I wrote the shit lol.
Anonymous
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>>18927692 hell of a finish, quite literally so.
Anonymous
>>18932182 >>18932069 >>18932028 >>18931815 >We interrupt this post-wrestling show broadcast for a special news bulletin! >This just in...we here at Pepe New Network (PNN) have just received this on our headlines desk hot off the presses. >We understand at this time that George R. Lundy, resident /pw/ nonce known for sniffing the floors of McDonald's play pen ball pits and currently serving his sentence in Wrestler's Court, has just been confirmed to be the biological son of one Henry Dee Chew, apparently arrested in 1993 for raping an eleven year old girl. It is this news platforms understanding after a 2 week long investigation that Mr. Chew illegally immigrated to the United States and took on the pseudonym Al "King Kong" Lundy and began courting woflie's mom simply by scratching her behind her ears and putting more water in her dish. It was afterwards that Chew and wolfie's mom consummated their relationship with Mr. Chew conceiving one Mr. George R. Lundy by fucking Mrs. Lundy up the ass because her cunt was so busy, and subsequent line-up of bubble-lipped, pipe-hittin' negroes waiting to squirt some spoozle up inside her hairy fish literally stretched around the Section-8 housing block. We here at PNN, as well as our good friends at the K-WAB wrestling federation, condone and condemn paedophilia in all forms and find it in bad taste to make humour out of, never mind throw it so flippantly as a baseless accusation against someone. However, we also don't consider Lundy to be human, never mind worthy of respect, pity, let alone pussy. We of course will keep you updated on this developing story about that big buttfucking faggot hanging around too many trooncords and being all so familiar with pedophiles what with the company he keeps, for surely with his lack of a life and refusal to take his meds, wolfclit's noncery will make an appearance in the future. >We here at the network are looking forward to the next K-WAB broadcast straight from ringside. Pepe Von Erich !!kzFsPJ8+7a6
>>18932524 Good to see you again, News Pepe. That report was both based and hilarious indeed. So based that I am going to give you an exclusive scoop. The main event for next week has been decided, and it will be...The Undertaker Vs "Macho Man" Randy Savage!
Anonymous
>>18932655 OOOOOOH YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAA
Anonymous
>>18932655 now that's more like it
Anonymous
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>>18932655 >>18933034 >>18933127 Gentlemen, we have dimes incoming.
Anonymous
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>>18932524 Hey there, one of the guys who originally dug up all the currently known information about Lundy aka Nu-Wolfie here.
While that picture is funny, it's not Lundy. That's a picture of one of Lundy's IRL friends and potential posting lackies "Robert". Robert goes by the name "physticks" online and is a physics major.
Anonymous
Anonymous
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>>18932655 Looks like it's going to be a badass main event.