>>5759680>>5759721>>5759746>>5759800 (it is played for humor, but yes the main character has to jack off his sword. The whole game is big on the whole sex and violence duality shit.)Thinking that staying where the enemies are while you recharge your weapon is not wise, you run into a small closed store where you can jack off as the audience demands- Err, recharge your weapon's batteries first.
...How do you do that, though?
Pulling out an user manual from your pocket like a fucking cartoon and reading it out loud to the audience, you dread the answers you get.
"So, first slide down the safety lock and..." Blah, blah, yadda, yadda. The weapon needs some warmth. Sure, cool. At least you're alone. You slide that thing between your thighs and... Well, this a blue board, are you sure this is okay?! Whatever, you warm it up until it's ready to go again just in time to get spotted by the enemy... Who is just as uncomfortable as you are.
>>5759730>>5759764You don't even kill him, you just run away and pretend nothing happened. Probably a good call as you tackle the doors of the candy shop open! The thugs in suits try to chase you, but now that you're in, you are much closer to your target... But... <span class="mu-i">Where is she?</span>
All that you see in here are many candies, chocolates, marshmallows, cookies, sweets... Enough to give you mortal diabetes at least 51 times over. And two elves with machine guns.
Well, guys dressed as christmas elves. Did I mention it's January? These guys are a bit late to the party, but that doesn't make them less deadly! They fire at you on sight, and you barely manage to avoid being turned into cheese.
Still, your match was supposed to be here! Where did she run off to?! The only door you see is the one leading to a storage room, but a particularly muscular elf seems to be guarding it...
>Focus on the machine gun elves first! They're fast and will catch you if you don't take them out first! [ATTACK]>Try to behead the big guy stealthily, or just... Do something to get rid of him without the other guys noticing. [ATTACK]>Or maybe a more creative solution...? [Write in.](Last update for today. Expect me tomorrow at the same bat-hour, same bat-channel. Hopefully I can avoid further blunders, I think we'll meet the boss tomorrow.)
>Captcha: RM00T 