>>5967833The void extends beyond the end of the universe. Etsy finds herself in front of a black, amorphous beast.
[As was someone's wish, I have put you into a 'contest' of sorts. I have questions. Answer them. You will not leave until I receive the truth. I have allowed you to speak within this place temporarily.] The beast 'says', its voice more a thought than a sound.
Etsy gives a weak nod. "U-Uh, okay, it's a dream right? I-It has to be, so I guess it should be fine?"
[Very well. Let us begin. Can you maintain a proper posture for an entire day?]
"Uh, I-I mean, define 'proper'-"
[Rethorical. You cannot, I know that much about you. I was asking out of politeness. Next question, are you able to beat a human child of 1 to 3 years of age in combat.]
"I-I guess I could? I-I'd feel kind of bad about it, I have kids t-too, and it'd remind me of them too much."
[Similar question as the previous one, but with a dog.]
"D-Do I get to use K.I.S.A? I don't t-think I could otherwise."
[Your mechanical creation is not allowed to participate in this hypothetical.]
"I wouldn't be able to beat a d-dog, then. they're scary..."
[Similar question. Homeless man under the influence of methamphetamine.]
"I-I'd probably just run and w-wait for him to pass out from o-overdose, that counts, right?"
[All the following questions are likely to result in failure without your machines, so let us skip to something more your speed. Are you capable of moderate weight lifting?]
"U-Uh, I do lift heavy things very often, so probably?"
[Are you capable of running for a mile uninterrupted.]
"A-Are you just asking those questions to make fun of m-me? I-I'm not an athlete! Only athlete can run that long, r-right? Gotta b-be superhuman..."
[would you survive being hit by a fully loaded truck transporting refuse? Similar question with a corn silo.]
"L-Like a garbage truck? I-I'd probably survive, I actually have some emergency stuff planned out in case of a c-car accident. M-Most of my body isn't augmented though. A corn s-silo... m-maybe, assuming I see it c-coming, my wedding ring has a few things installed just in case."
[Would you survive a gunshot to the cranium.]
"I-I wouldn't, but anyone that did that is g-going to regret it. I have multiple death switches, and I-I believe mutually assured destruction is the most reliable form of self-defense."
[Would you survive being thrown into the vacuum of space.]
"O-Oh, I actually would, not for f-for very long, but I do have some emergency measures for this s-specific situation. M-Maybe a few days until I died of dehydration."
