>>5974865Ah, you’re weeping. It would seem Asher’s covers are a tear-stricken mess, the dagger is discarded on the floor, and you have a pillow in a hug more similar to a grapple. Maybe it’s a good thing Asher and Midori are still out. And yet, it feels- It feels nice. To cry, to yell, to lay it all bare to an empty room, devoid of everything but the light of the moon. Goddess, you’re pathetic, aren’t you?
It takes this catharsis for you to really look back, back to a time when your heart has held under lock and key. Did Albrecht ever feel the same way you felt about him? Or was it all just a fantasy of your overactive imagination? Was that really aloofness you saw or was he simply uncaring?
Do you even want to know the answer?
You can only realize now that not even before Anastasia did he treat you the way he treated her. The dagger struck your heart in a way nothing had before, or after, and you let the prince into the open wound without reservation, was it possible you never managed to enter his heart? You remember his cutting words before, during, and after your duel. You had crushed the other inconsequential noble boys who came to Lyndale’s assistance without a second thought. But you could never hope to beat Albretch, even if he was a subpart fighter compared to you. It didn’t even matter if Cathrine was right and the commoner girl was giving him some sort of boost. You’re not sure your heart would allow you to win, to beat the man who directed the course of your life.
“You’ve never cared for my wants, only yourself!” He screamed. That was false, you did care.
“All you want is to sit on the throne, you’re only after my position!” He yelled. When have you ever cared about ruling? That was the duty of your brother, not you.
“You’ve never understood me, never understood me like Ana does!” He roared. Yet, maybe he was right. Maybe you did never understand him, all you understood was the image of him that entered your childish heart.
But now all of that is in the past, the memories, the pain, it’s behind you now. Now you have a new life, a new duty, and perhaps even new friends- No. Even if you wanted to, and you do want to, you’re not sure your pathetic heart would allow others to enter it so easily anymore.
Though you don’t think you’d mind if they somehow managed to slip through the cracks.
